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2002-10-07 - 7:34 p.m.
Threat for the Week™: "You! What's your name? Yeah, you! That's it. You're going to Mr. Santini's office." I've finally found the perfect substitute job. I hope this teacher gets lightly clipped by a bus so he can recline in peace and comfort and riches from the insurance settlement for the rest of the year while I take his class. I get to come in at 8, sit in front of an iMac and get online while a small group of kids files in, sits at the computers and works, and files out again. And I'm done at 12:15, and I get paid for a full day. And I don't have to keep track of who the kids are, because THEY HAVE TO LOG IN! Their login only works on their assigned computer, and creates a tracking record of what they've done during the time they were in my gentle care. So all I do is print it out at the end of the day to see who was working and who wasn't. And they're not allowed to go to the bathroom since they're only in here for 40 minutes at a time. Yee-ha. It's a paid vacation in an industrial-chic room full of buzzing computers and glassy-eyed preteens for moi. The only better possibility would be a job substituting at the library. In honor of the occasion, I've composed this short poem: Nihil agere delectat. The worried are thin, but not the fat; they know Nihil agere delectat. Shall you work like a dog, or nap like a cat? Nihil agere delectat. If you know the secret, it's under your hat. Nihil agere delectat. Wait for Godot, and have a nice little chat. Nihil agere delectat. One with the demo, but no tea with the crat. Nihil agere delectat. You'll never take me alive, you dirty rat. Nihil agere delectat. - \/\/heel
 
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